Monday, April 30, 2012

Falling down the rabbit hole

Alice in Wonderland
Figuratively speaking! I apologize for my erratic posts of late. I am on a deadline to get my life back on track. I am preparing to go back to school.
The white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland
I feel very much like the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland. Always in hurry. Always chafing under time restraints. Always late...for something. 

I have so many things (tasks, responsibilities,, demands) I am trying to balance. My daily chores, my budget, the needs and request from everyone on my time, managing my push to be more self sufficient (which includes learning sewing/ quilting, canning and expanding my garden), the never-ending home improvements (which are necessary to reduce our utility consumption), all the paperwork, applications and testing for school (so that I can have new career)  and somewhere admist the chaos carving  time for me.

"Which road do I take?" (Alice)
"Where do you want to go?" (Cheshire Cat)
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then, said the cat, it doesn't matter.”
“If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there.”

When you think about it Alice in Wonderland seems to be a good narrative for my life. Bored  and complacent (my previous job), I fall down the rabbit hole (becoming unemployed) encounter various unusual creatures in Wonderland (all the governmental agencies I must deal with) as I go on a most unusual journey on a river of tears, some days I feel small and some days I feel big. I have already endured the vexing and annoying conversations of the Cheshire cat (embodied by the know-it-alls) engaged in battle with the Queen of Hearts (those that have attempted to cut me down and belittle me) and now I would like to believe I have made way out of the rabbit hole, awoken from my dark fantasy to emerge stronger and self assured.

“Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.” 
― Lewis CarrollAlice in Wonderland

I think I finally have the puzzle complete, have regained my sense of self and have climbed out of the rabbit hole. 

“I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then. ” 
― Lewis CarrollAlice in Wonderland



2 comments:

  1. Hang in there!!!!!!!!! :-)

    And p.s. I owe you an email, I just found it last night about four pages/screens back in my mailbox. D'oh!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love the analogy and you can do it! And I can relate to feeling small and big when I try to take on the world.

    ReplyDelete

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