The Longest Bathroom Remodel in History (part 2012)

Okay there really aren't 2012 parts to this. Just me being sarcastic ( BITTER!) about this project not being complete. I originally blogged about the bathroom remodel here and  here.

The sad part is I did the update on 11/3/11 AND the hubbs still has NOT finished the things I don't know how to do (or am to scared to try for fear of ruining stuff). I installed the mirror and the towel ring. After much prodding NAGGING he installed the towel rod and toilet paper holder. However, I could have beat him with his own hammer last weekend. Let me tell you why I contemplated homicide...

My stepdad and brother-in-law (who has his own construction business) offered to come over and finish up for me. (They REALLY feel sorry for me--I don't care I will take the project pity help). And my hubbs said..NO! WTH? Is he flipping insane?! GAHHHH!

I think I may have actually burst a blood vessel over that. You can only imagine the "conversation"  that ensued shortly thereafter. (And for you men reading this blog , you may need to cup your nether regions and anyone with a delicate constitution you had best leave the blog now.)

Here is a play by play of the bloody massacre that occurred. You were warned...

ME: (Standing in the kitchen, arms crossed) "Ummmm, WTH?"
Hubbs: "WTH what?"
ME: "OMG! SERIOUSLY?! are you gonna play stupid now? Or is that not an act? (Oh yes I did--I went for the jugular--I am vicious sometimes)
Hubbs:@#$%! WTF was that about?
ME: @#$% yourself! WHY WHY WHY!!! Did you tell BIL and Dad not to come over?!
Hubbs: oh...ummm
ME: WELL?!
Hubbs: Well...err..I was on call and couldn't be here.
ME: (Wildly gesturing and slamming things around) SO @#$%^& what! WHY does it matter if YOU are here. I mean it is n't like you have done much of anything with the bathroom. WHEN did we start this project? LET ME REFRESH YOUR MEMORY! September @#$%^& 26 @#$%^& 2009! AND IT STILL ISN'T FINISHED!!!! Almost 3 mf@#$%^& years! THAT"S HOW LONG! THEY COULD HAVE FINISHED IT--TODAY!

Hubbs: says nothing and looks down)

ME: I am ready to beat you with your own hammer! I...DO ...NOT...UNDERSTAND...WHY you did this?!

Hubbs: I dunno (still looking down)

ME: Do you hate our house? Do you LIKE living this way? Because I sure as @#$% don't.

Hubbs: NO!! I love this house!

ME: Then the next time someone offers help DO NOT turn it down! OH and btw you no longer get to make any decisions. From now on everyone will deal with ME. They will talk to ME. I will manage this JUST like I do everything else!

Hubbs: I'm sorry I didn't think it was a big deal.

ME: (GAH! I think this is where I burst a blood vessel. I pretty much did a 2 handed palm face plant and may have actually ripped some hair out when I ran my hands through it)  I can NOT believe you said that. IT is a HUGE deal. Who on this planet has a 3 year bathroom remodel? No one--oh wait except for us. ARRRGGGG! I can't even talk to you anymore  right now! 

Hubbs: ummm....

ME: OMG! Just GO!!  Go to work. Go to the garage. Just go and leave me alone! (I turn away because I really feel like crying at this point)
Hubbs:  (heavy sigh) Footsteps followed by the quiet clicking of the door. 

So...yeah. I was a complete hysterical asshole and completely emasculated him. He was a completely insensitive oafish asshole who didn't realize what this means to me. We are the asshole couple.  It took a few hours but we finally met halfway (literally in the carport, haha),  both duly apologized and both said I'm sorry for being an ass. And both said our I Love You's. And we do love each other. But boy oh boy-- there sure is a fine line between love and hate sometimes. Just sayin'

It's all good now. Meaning me and the hubbs. Not the bathroom. It is still not complete.

The good news is it looks waaaaaayyyyy better than the original

Before (YUCK!!)

After  Not quite complete

 I swear the mirror and light fixture are centered. I guess I just shot this at a weird angle.

My cute light fixture

I bought the knobs and back-plates at Menard's for $10 total and it gives is a more custom look. Hardware is your cabinets jewelry!

Sorry-Sam-sam is my photo-bomber! I told you I liked birds so I snuck a little bird theme in here.

White subway tile and a little accent of glass mosaic.

Still need to install all the trim moldings, shower rod and accessorize. But it is oh so close to finished.....sigh

 Worlds away from the hideous ugly bath that we had before. It is very small. Probably would not work for a family with kids, but for 2 empty nesters I think it is fine! What do you think so far?

Shared on  http://thriftydecorchick.blogspot.com/2012/02/february-before-and-after-party.html 2/06/2012

Update 2/07/2012--Check out some of teaks we made here!

Stencil Madness

Earlier this month I lamented the lack of design in my stairwell (as shown here). Well I went on a mission of inspiration to one of the happiest places on earth. No--not Disneyland. Or  IKEA. I went to Michael's. I love craft stores!

While shopping for some Christmas craft goodies (which is another post), I decided to wander the aisles and I stumbled upon some stencils! I found my inspiration!

Martha Stewart Crafts™ Arabesque Laser-Cut Stencils

There are 11 different stencils in this pack. originally priced at $16.99 but I had a coupon for 40% . After the coupon discount and tax I paid $10.90 which is the equivalent of $0.99 per stencil. Not to bad my little mathematical minions!  I envision all sorts of stenciling projects. WOOT!

 I like these 2 the best.

Iron works

Arabesque tile

The lower portion of the staircase 

   

will be painted Valspar Smoked Oyster 

6005-1C

The  upper portion of the staircase

will be painted  Valspar Oatlands Subtle Taupe

6005-1B

Then to break up the expanse I will stencil the Ironwork's pattern in a Pearlized white. I think the white will provide a nice contrast. The pearl will have just enough sheen and shimmer to bounce the light around. I do plan to add artwork, photos, and possibly a quilt.  (Don't forget the stair treads will be a nice dark Cappuccino color and the risers a bright crisp white!) 

I love the ideal of this stencil. It will look like wallpaper without all the icky glue. So excited to work on this! That is until I have a hunchback and claw-hands from spouncing paint for the stencil effect. Oh and there is the whole afraid of heights  and climbing a 14 foot ladder issue. Details, details....

And to my daughter who said-"Your just gonna paint it Beige and Cream, Mom. It's your thing."  I say  "Hush yer' mouth!"

(And I just might work that Arabesque tile pattern onto my risers...you just never know!)

Is there a Guiness Book of Records category for the longest bathroom remodel in history?

The date was 9/26/2009. I was bright eyed and bushy tailed. Due to some unforseen circumstances (i.e. the waterfall pouring from my upstairs bathroom might be a  clue something was amiss) we were forced to begin the much anticipated (1 of 2) bathroom remodel. Oh darn!  I was really gonna miss the fake oak cabinet, the gold and white faux marble counter top, the plastic tile walls in the high-end design of white, gray and blue flowers, the dingy acrylic bathtub, green and brown pebble linoleum and the toilet you had to..um sit sidesaddle on--or else you would smack your knees on the sink vanity. Yeah...NOT

So now the date is April 4, 2011. Where is my beautiful new bathroom? The high gloss white wall tiles, the smooth granite countertop, the new and expanded layout? Still in the photoshopped magazine layout of any home improvement magazine. Back to earth with a resounding thud. It seems my dreams of grandeur = much moula I do not have (and if I do have it, it has been acquired illegally and I am looking at slammer time)....sigh!

Soooo, what did I get? Well.... we did gut the room to the studs. The hubby refused to expand the footprint, so it is still a VERY small bathroom at 5 1/4 ft x 7 1/2 ft. For a full size bath...Really?! The plumbing was reconfigured to best utilize the small space (which ain't saying much). The electrical was slightly updated to include a GFI--no home perms for me! The room has since been insulated and vapor barrier installed. Green board and cement backer board is installed--although there was the incident of hubby installing the backer board incorrectly. Do over anyone?

The beautiful new enamel on steel tub is securely installed and the water connection checked (Yay for no leaks!). Everything has been mudded, taped and sanded. The beachy sand colored ceramic floor tile has been mortared in and  yet to be grouted. The beautiful high gloss white subway tiles and corresponding trim pieces, the neutral glass mosaic tiles for accent and all the sleek and shiny satin nickel hardware sit forlornly in the corner of the spare bedroom  are now installed. As did the new toilet--which is FORTUNATELY still in the box  is also installed. How disconcerning would that be to see that everday. Yeah that had to go out to the garage. No john in the bedroom unless it is John-ny Depp....um what was I saying....

On the upside of TWLBRIH (That would be THE WORLD"S LONGEST BATHROOM REMODEL IN HISTORY) is I have had MORE than adequate time to score some awesome deals. The 13" ceramic floor tile- only $0.75/ tile. The bathtub was on sale for $109, I had a $20 coupon and a $50 gift card, so my out of pocket price was $39 plus chump change to cover the tax. The cost to reconfigure all the plumbing was the cost of all the materials and a CHEAP-O favor= slave labor from a family friend at $125.00. Considering there was a full 8 hrs of work, can you imagine what I would have had to pay a plumber on my own dime--YIKES!

The subway tile was $0.22/ tile and I had a $20 coupon for the total order. All the hardware (sink and tub faucets, towel bars) are from Ovrstock at 65% of the original cost. The light fixture was a clearance item for $10. The best deal was the the wall mount tilt mirror. Found at the local thrift shop still in the package with ALL of the hardware AND instructions--(you know a man didn't buy it cause they always throw the instructions away)-- retails at $50 and I got it for $4.50! YAY for thrift-erific bargains!

We are currently 60% 90%c ompleted on the bathroom. So 60%  x 19 months= a helluva long time. I hate math. Hopefully we will be finished before the 2yr 30 month mark comes around. Unless there IS a Guiness category and I am gonna have to win that sucker. What DO you win for a Guiness category?...


UPDATE... As of November 3, 2011 the only remaining projects are to install the crown moulding, hang the shower rod, hang the mirror, install the exhaust vent and accessorize. As soon as it is complete, I will post a picture! Yay!