Friday, April 26, 2013

The Dress Shirt Debacle

Happy Friday Y'all!

It is a sunshiny (albeit chilly) day here in Ohio. I made a pilgrimage to Kohl's to deal a with what is now called the dress shirt debacle. Just hang with me while I veer off on a slight tangent. Um you may want to go get yer diet coke or coffee 'cause I am gonna yammer on for a bit! 

The hubbs had a recognition ceremony to attend this week for his 15th work anniversary. The problem, as it were, he no longer fits (chubby hubby or as our daughter calls him--Fatty McDaddy, haha) into his beautiful and expensive  black suit that we purchased 2 years ago for our daughter's wedding. And yes- he only has 1 suit because the hubbs is strictly a non suit wearing kinda guy with the rare exceptions of walking his baby girl down the aisle, being a pallbearer for a funeral and in this case, his recognition ceremony.

Well, we are on a tight budget with me still not working and going to school full time. So I needed to find him a suit that didn't look cheap but wasn't going to bust the bank account.  I checked around a few stores and everything was too darn pricey.  I decided to check Kohl's because they tend to carry a nice selection of reasonably priced items. It was my lucky day! Mix and match suit separates were buy one and get the second piece for an additional dollar. A dollar makes ya' holler! Oh crap-I totally just channeled Honey Boo-Boo.

 I found him a a nice Navy Blue suit jacket and pants. I had a choice of blue, black, brown or grey. It turns out the blue was the set I found in his size (46L jacket and 36/34 dress slacks). The hubbs is tall and broad in shoulders and looks mighty fine when dressed up, haha. So ANYWAY (shesh this is a long story) I found him a nice tie, new dress socks and a pinstripe dress shirt (18 1/2). Cool right? Wrong!

The dress shirt fit great in the arms and shoulders but billowed like a tent everywhere else. It seems I knew nothing about buying a man's dress shirt. So the next day I went back to Kohl's and found the same dress shirt in a size 17. Easy peasy even exchange. I came home gave it to the hubbs and thought all was right with the world.

The next morning the hubbs is tapping my shoulder at 7am  to wake me. Mind you I am a bit delirious because I had not gone to bed until 4am. I had stayed up late to study for my exam, I barely remember staggering up the stairs to fall into a sleep like the dead. So there I am, all squinty and bleary eyed, as he is yammering on about the shirt not fitting. WHAT?!  The hubbs ceremony is scheduled at noon...crap crap crap! Sure enough--his arms and wrists were sticking out the shirt sleeves like he was a gangly long limbed teenager. URGH! Panic...

So yeah, apparently I didn't know there other numbers indicating the shirt size-which I found out was the neck size the followed by the arm length. Well seems I had bought a 17 (34/35). I convinced the hubbs to go to work wearing  a white dress shirt sans tie so I can either get the correct sized dress shirt or a new tie that works with the navy blue suit and white dress shirt without making him look like he stepped of the good ship lollipop. "Don't worry", I tell him, "I will meet you at your work in an hour-you will have plenty of time to get ready  before you need to leave."

So I jump out of bed, run through the shower, grab the shirt and receipt,corral the dogs, let the cat out,  head to my car to take off to Kohl's when I realize I don't know what time they open. I run back in the house, tripping over dog toys AND dogs , make my way to the laptop, impatiently wait for it to  power up, log on, pull-up the website and yeeeesss-I am in luck-they open at 8am. I look at the clock it is 7:45am. Sweet, I have plenty of time.

I take a few minutes to refold the shirt, make sure I have the receipt and then realize there are no tags on the shirt.  Oh no! Where are they?  I call the hubbs to ask what he had done with the tags. In the trash...arrggg! So here I am, gloved up, picking through banana peels and coffee grounds (Thank goodness the trash had been emptied the evening before) and I ask myself 2 questions. 1. Why isn't the hubbs composting those like I asked him to? and 2. Is this really worth it? Then I remember it is a $30 shirt so, yeah, totally worth it.

After wiping of the coffee grounds and putting the tag in snack sized zip lock baggie (it was in the trash after all),  I finally arrive at Kohl's and hope I can get  the situation fixed pronto. I must say I am feeling a little weird because here I  am3 days in row- going to the same Kohls- for a dress shirt. I was convinced they were gonna call security on me because they thought I was pulling a scam.

When  reach customer service, it s the same lady who had done my exchange the day before.  I stammer through my apologies feeling every bit of an idiot. It turns out they did not have the same dress shirt in the hubbs size. So I found a new tie, took it to the hubbs and was relieved to be done with the entire debacle.

His recognition went well. He had a great meal, an award and the best part? The hubbs was awarded gift cards (Target-which he gave to me-yay!) and he was awarded a big fat bonus (which he kept, haha)!  Everything worked out but the next time I go shopping it will NOT be be for the hubbs, definitely NOT for a dress shirt and am pretty sure -thanks to the  gift cards-I foresee a trip to Target. sheesh


  1. Now that's funny! I mean, in retrospect of course, LOL!

  2. Reminds me of trying to buy clothes for my boys, before they finally stopped growing. At least I hope they're done! They're both 6'2" now, so it's still not easy to find clothes long enough.


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